In Short Form
I’m shorter at the end of the day. Now, so is everyone else’s writing.
The short form of information is appealing. CNN does it with synopses scrolled at the bottom of its news shows, while someone long-winded, and most likely sexually frustrated, is boring us at the top. Anyone with a Twitter account can showcase their moods, their meals and their sex lives in less than thirty words. This is bad news for those of us getting paid by the word. It’s good news for a population where one in three people are diagnosed with ADHD.
X words or less has infiltrated everywhere.
There’s a genre of fiction called micro fiction, where authors tell a story in 200 words or less. W. W. Norton, a huge literary publisher, even created an anthology, and the genre grows in popularity every day.
Sally Law of the New Yorker cites a Tweeter named Sean Hill who is writing short stories on his Twitter account, using nouns supplied by fellow Twitters for his characters. The short form is satisfying for its instant gratification, its meaning cut into bite-sized pieces.
As a writer, my bank account suffers. As a person, the short form appeals to me. Political correctness calls for a person to dance around every subject with countless unnecessary words to pad actual meaning. The following is what would happen if I could integrate the short form into all the factions of my life:
During a painful, drawn-out break-up: The End.
Ordering dinner at a fancy restaurant: Feed me.
Having to suffer through yet another Eminem album release: Please stop.
Cleaning up after a dinner party while guests are still milling around in the dining room, finishing off the last dregs of cheap red wine: Do it yourself.
During an awkward meeting with an old colleague/schoolmate: I never liked you.
At a job interview: Did I get it or what?
I used to work at an upscale hair salon as a receptionist. A freshly coiffed client asks me how I like her new ‘do. Short form would call for: Should have shaved it.
Finding out yet another one of your friends is pregnant: I’m sorry.
Cheers to Twitter and Hill for saying what you mean when you say it. It’s refreshing.
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